Be a Better...Dresser.
Recently, a Be Better Blog reader wrote in with this (witty) query:
"I just started dragging my ass back to the gym and I'm finding that I'm in dire need of an updated workout wardrobe. My mesh gym shorts from college don't seem quite sufficient when I know that space-age wicking technology exists. ALSO, I would like said ass not to be hanging out while I do leg things. Could you (pretty please) do post that gives like 5 combinations of gear that I can mix and match, but won't require doing laundry every five minutes?"
This is a great question as workout clothes can be tricky tricky. As an example of failing, I tried out some NEW athletic shorts this morning and hadn't looked in the mirror until I arrived to the gym. TOTAL AIR FUPA people. You know as a kid when you loved filling your swimsuit with air, looking like either you had a boob job or beer belly? Yeah, those shorts looked like that except I wasn't in a pool, nor am I 5 years old. Not to mention the lining was too short (apparently according to the manufacturer I have an elongated crotch region?!) so I had perma-camel toe. No one likes camel-toe squats. NO ONE.
When building your workout wardrobe, here are a few basic items you'll need:
//SUMMARY SHOPPING LIST//
-2 Pairs of Loose Sporty Shorts/Booty Shorts
-2-3 Supportive Sports Bras
- 1 pair of Yoga/Running Pants
-Non-see through colors: You DO NOT want your days of the week undies showing through.
-Built in liner: It's just a must these days, folks.
-Great fit in the crotch region (as I learned previously): Avoid air fupas, avoid wedgies.
-Ample coverage: Unless you are ONLY running, you'll be bending, squatting, leaning, and burpee-ing for a full hour or more...so it's best if you don't accidentally get pregnant via the leg extension machine. Think enough coverage so your lady bits stay ladylike.
-Happy Colors: Pick a couple fun colors for tanks that make you WANT to work out. You'll feel better about that 6am gym time and bright pops of color make your no-makeup face more alive looking!
-Athletic or Natural Materials: This is a non-negotiable. Cotton OR Dri-fit hi-tech sh*t. If you show up at the gym in a Forever21 Polyester tank top and you'll end up being the smelly/overly sweaty gal on the mats. The good news? You'll have plenty of room to stretch because your odor and general wet aesthetic will have caused everyone to flee.
-Refresh Often: Hanes men's white v-neck tees cost a whole $10 per pack. Re-buy them every month or two to keep your whites looking fresh.
-Cups/Liner: Don't risk poking your trainer's eye out mid-workout with a rogue nipple. Make sure your sports bra has thin cups that keep pancake boob away and protect you from chronic NHO.
-Great Fit: High-knee runs should not include kicking your tatas ala David Beckham. Keep 'em high and tight.
-Essential Fit: Be sure you get the right size for the types of workouts you'll be doing. You may need to go a size or 1/2 size up...the best thing to do is ask your shoe salesperson to fit you properly.
-Keep An Eye Out: Every couple of months, check the bottoms of your shoes...especially if you're having back or knee pain. You may be wearing out your shoes, therefore wearing out your much needed support.
-Dark Colors: Dark color minimize trouble areas like ass, thighs, and giant calves..not to mention the whole "mask the cellulite" game we've all played at one time or another. Also, you'll want these to be able to be worn over and over without recognition so black or dark grey will always work.
-Wide and Flexible Waistband: A general rule of life, avoid muffins and muffin tops. You want your pants to be comfortably tight in the leg region, but beware of thin super tight waistbands. They'll make you feel self-conscious and you'll spend half your workout tucking in rolls, rather than getting rid of them.
-Non-See Through: A little tip, when in the fitting room to buy workout pants, lean over and spread eagle. Can you see your vagina? Yes? You need a different pair. No? You're good to go.
A few tips and tricks for lazy people like me:
-Mid-week, toss your workout shorts/bras/pants in the shower with you and rinse them out with a little detergent. They are made to dry quick so they'll be fresh and ready for the next workout. Yes, you'll still need to do actual laundry once in a while, this is just to freshen in between real washes if you are one of us who doesn't have in-home laundry.
-Avoid Patterned Workout Gear. The more nondescript the gear is, the more you'll be able to wear it. Still feel free to inject bright colors but those snake skin print yoga pants might be a bit much.
-Keep things snug. As much as you might want to roll out of bed and throw on a huge t-shirt and basketball shorts...you should avoid this. More fitted items let you actually see your body as you work out, you'll be able to perfect your form because you won't be lost in a sea of college-age jersey material. As a bonus, you'll be able to see your progress more easily when those booty shorts look a little more filled out. Feeling hot (even at the gym)= instant motivation (And no, that does not mean to put on makeup).
